Likely among the first words that greet a new emerging human life are "Congratulations! It's a ..."
What is that based on really? At that stage of life, there's been no question and answer period and no psychological evaluation or interaction. There is, however, an individual known as the "Attending Physician." Mr. or Ms. AP, using all their skill and medical training, either carefully, kindly and gently coaxes the baby from the mother, while reminding said mother that the excruciating pain (like none other ever before experienced) is quite normal and the outcome will certainly be ok. Either that or the mother is effectively sedated while the AP grabs a scalpel and with a few magnificently deft strokes, creates an incision through which our new baby emerges into the world, innocently unknowing of the incredibly wide world which awaits. Invariably the baby appears to have either a vagina or a penis- let the ride begin!
Did you ever stop to think about what happens at that very moment?! That first exclamation, based on superficial observation alone sets so many precedents, actions and thoughts into motion!
New parents oblige willingly (with all the best intentions) right from the beginning- "Oh my goodness, we need to get Pink/blue clothes! We need to get action toys/dolls! We need to plan attending football games/dance recitals! We need to pick out a tuxedo/wedding gown!....." And then society chimes in right behind the parents with even further emphasis on the expectations that this newborn baby will most certainly be expected to live up to.
General society often tends to follow right along with the assumptions and expectations.
For boys, they’re expected to play sports, hunt, fish; activities that require physical strength and macho.
Girls, by contrast are expected to dress in pastel colors, play with dolls and learn domestic responsibilities such as cooking, sewing, or even tending to family.
The exceptions (and there are fortunately many) have to break out of the stereotypes, prove their uniquely different personality or traits are valid and acceptable.
For presentation in teens and beyond, all the aforementioned stereotypes play along, based on an individual’s outward appearance. If an individual appears to be male, he certainly must have interests within the scope of existing stereotypical expectations. If an individual appears to be female, her interests are assumed to also fit into the neatly formed opinion box of stereotypes as well.
Well...I happen to know some incredibly cool people who just don’t fit ANY preconceived stereotype. I don’t either. One thing I know now proceeding through transition- if people perceive me as a female and assume I might like to cook or sew, they’re not as far off. In fact, many of their assumptions are likely more accurate that when they formerly perceived me as male. Conversations begin on better first notes. There’s a sometimes surprising aspect to my being- I hunted, fished and won motorcycle races, so they can’t rightfully argue I don’t understand- for now, give me a set of pots and pans and a good recipe. Gonna feed me & friends good tonight!
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